my soapbox

friends!

2011-03-06T18:11:00.005-06:00

i finished watching the entire series this weekend. hooray!

i didn't watch it when it first came on the air because i was in middle school, but i ended up watching it regularly when i went to college. it was our thing to do after thursday night dinner.

i'm glad i watched it in its entirety because i got a lot more of the jokes and story lines. now i can return to watching regular tv and can cross #6 off the list.

baby lucy

2011-02-22T06:00:00.000-06:00

2011-02-21T15:46:00.004-06:00

i crossed #3 off my list today.

i met with a financial advisor this afternoon, and it was so informative. it was so helpful to have someone who knows what they are talking about educate me on all the stuff that i have never understood.

two signs that 30 is getting old: 1. it felt good to plan for retirement...a retirement that is probably 30 years away. 2. i declined a spur of the moment birthday trip so that i could save money to put towards my car payments.

2011-02-19T17:49:00.002-06:00

fyi...sometimes cooking things from a mix makes you oblivious to how BAD the food really is. i just made brownies from scratch, and now i know why they taste so delicious. 2 entire cups of sugar.

oh.my.word.

wednesday's list of random thoughts

2011-02-16T18:54:00.006-06:00

1. i got several valentine's day presents/cards...all from kids under the age of 8. they were super cute.

2. i got a postcard in the mail yesterday for a check-up for mr. kitty. a geriatric check-up. he's going to be 8...not 88.

3. and in earth-shattering news...i'm so MAD about our toomer's corner trees. seriously? why in the world would someone do that??? you can't really undo or clean up DEAD. please, for the love, do NOT compare it to any prank about a jersey or a statue. it's not the same.

4. i completed number #11 tonight, and i decided to cook breakfast. the only recipe that i really liked and ate was the sweet potato biscuits. they were so good! the other things had too much extra stuff in it. i love paula deen and all, but it is possible to have too much butter.

5. no spend february is sailing along, not without a bump or two though. i caught a lot of grief when i politely declined going to lunch with friends last week. so, i ended up going to lunch that day and dinner another day. i guess it should be frugal february instead...i haven't done any shopping (outside of grocery shopping) and only ate out those two times. it has forced some good habits that i hope stick around.

snow!

2011-02-09T18:50:00.003-06:00

it's official. i'm over the snow. it snowed monday, and it snowed today. as i type, there are 6 inches out there.

i'm quite lucky to have a friend that i work with that is also from pennsylvania. so, she has driven me to and from work a few days. hip hip hooray for that and for her mad driving skills. i HATE to drive on the snow covered roads. it doesn't do much for my nerves.

here are some pictures of the white stuff that needs to go away.

look....no feet. granted it's not the feet of snow that oklahoma has been getting. but honey, i live in tennessee where it's not supposed to snow this much or this frequently!

my casa...

and mr. kitty longingly looking out the window at us.

2011-01-31T18:08:00.005-06:00

i learned something today. i am not impressed with an art exhibit that is simply photographs. tammy and i went to the frist, and let's just say that i'm glad that weren't charging any admission today. i would have been a bit upset that i had to pay money to see 20 pictures that my sister could have taken.

give me some painting where i can see all the work that went into it any day. celia will not be going to another exhibit of photographs. bor-ing.

and while technically this wasn't a museum, it's just gonna have to count for my #16 cause it's close enough.

2011-01-30T19:33:00.003-06:00

i'm going to try to go on a spending fast.

and it's gonna be hard, and i'm probably going to relapse. as my salary has increased, so has my "i make money so i can buy whatever i want" mentality. if i want something, i buy it...even if i don't really need it. it's not like i have a ton of debt, but it would be nice to pay my car off this year.

so, i'm only going to spend what i have to spend. no eating out, no buying things for my apartment, and no clothes, shoes, or big earrings.

i only want to spend money on essential things...like groceries, gas, and monthly bills. and i need to spend more time planning meals.

i declare february no spend month!

lucy has arrived!

2011-01-22T15:08:00.002-06:00

meet lucy, my new niece! she made her entry into the world yesterday but has had complications since then. she is currently in the nicu with bleeding on her brain possibly due to trauma during her birth. she is also having seizures because of this.

please pray for complete healing and for her very worried family.

we are the champions!

2011-01-22T14:24:00.012-06:00

plane tickets: $900
game ticket: $600
hotel room: $800
fan fare party: $35
watching auburn win the national championship in person: absolutely priceless (and worth every penny!)

the pep rally was so packed that we couldn't get in...

so we watched it from the parking garage across the street.

horney the bull at rustler's rooste. it was a very fun place with lots of good food!

game day!

mr. penny!

inside fan fare: cornhole, cadillac, food. it was fun and a good way to pass the time until tiger walk and game time!

tiger walk, only they didn't walk. we still lined the way and cheered...cause we were all in!

this was the crowd trying to get through the security check point. we all had to be patted down. i think there were only three of the check points...it took for-ever!

the kick!

and we win and are officially the best team in college football! take that all you naysayers that have talked trash and doubted us all season!

we are #1!

viewer discretion is advised

2011-01-15T19:19:00.004-06:00

ok, let's just talk about what's on tv these days that has me totally grossed out.

1. my strange addiction 2. animal hoarders 3. hoarders

oh.my.word. as a mental health professional, things like these should not be so shocking to me. but episodes of these three shows have literally made me sick to my stomach.

after watching an episode of animal hoarders where a man had 30 cats, i cleaned my apartment from top to bottom and for a split second thought that my 2 cats were too many. when they lifted the man's couch up, the entire floor under it was covered in cat poo. and i immediately went and cleaned out my litter box.

as interesting as these shows are, i'm not so sure i can keep watching. the previews to hoarders where the guy has a ba-jillion rats in his home may have just done me in. grody gross!

these are the shows that should have a warning before you watch: viewer discretion is advised. the following show may induce vomiting, spontaneous and thorough cleaning, and over-analyzation of personal habits.

laugh at loud funny

2011-01-04T18:32:00.003-06:00

i rang in the new year at the comedy club in birmingham...with jon reep. he was funny as usual and made me laugh out loud! bye bye #29.

2010

2010-12-30T18:03:00.002-06:00

2010 started with a bang...a trip to hawaii in janurary. when your year starts with a trip like that...you know the year isn't going to be too shabby.

and it wasn't.

in 2010, i went to hawaii and got to see pearl harbor.

in 2010, i joined the 21st century and got an iphone. and oh how happy i am with it!

in 2010, my brother caught my hair on fire.

in 2010, i moved. and that made a world of difference. it cut my commute to work down 45 minutes each way and gave me back some sanity. it may have been the single best decision i made all year.

in 2010, my paw paw died, making me no longer have any grandparents that are living.

in 2010, i decided to be optimistic and hopeful and made a list of 30 things to do before i turned 30. i only gave myself 7 months to do them. i have 2 months and 13 days left now and have 14 things left to do. that's only half-way done. i better get to gettin'.

in 2010, i got my first professional hair cut in over 7 years. i am now considering cutting it myself again. it seems like such a waste, especially when i come home and chop on it afterwards.

in 2010, i went to the cmt music awards. it was fun.

in 2010, i was able to buy some more grown-up things to make my apartment more grown-up. washing machines and dryers are boring but make life so much easier when you own them!

in 2010, i got to see garth. one word: a-mazing! cross that off the bucket list!

in 2010, i went to new mexico.

in 2010, i got to see my a-mazing, currently undefeated tigers (along with the heisman trophy and lombardi award winners) play. i heart them!

in 2010, we had our first ever white christmas in alabama and got to make a snow-cam. again...lots of fun!

in 2010, i think i finally found a church home.

in 2010, i continued my black friday shopping tradition with the sister and the daphster. this year...in the rain and cold. that = dedication. or crazy.

in 2010, lots of interesting things happened at work. but i'm ok and my job is ok and i got a raise. i even got a high-five in the middle of staff meeting from my boss. go me!

in 2010, my eyes continued to get worse, and my prescription changed yet again. i wonder how bad my sight will be in 20 years.

in 2010, i have been keeping a plant alive. truly a miracle!

in 2010, my brother and his girlfriend got pregnant. well, she's the one pregnant. there was lots of drama around it, but we should have a granddaughter/daughter/niece in the next few weeks.

so, here's to you 2010. you were busy, hectic, with a little bit of grief and drama. let's hope 2011 is just as prosperous and fun (but without the drama).

wednesday's ramblings

2010-12-29T12:06:00.004-06:00

1. i just listened to smooth operator. at work. four times. apparently the janitors like this song.

2. it will be 2011 in 3 days. where in the world did the year go? the older i get the faster the time goes.

3. it is christmas break so things are much slower at work. i don't have another appointment for 2 whole hours. how glorious.

4. i get to see auburn play in arizona in less than 2 weeks. i'm super excited about that whole experience.

5. i think snow is pretty. however, i don't think it is pretty a week later when the temperature is still below 30 degrees. i hate extreme weather. i wish i lived in a magical place where it never got colder than 60 degrees or hotter than 80 degrees.

garth!

2010-12-18T11:06:00.004-06:00

on thursday, i got to see garth live and in person! the show was a-mazing! he is, by far, the best entertainer i have seen.

tammy and i waiting...

we gave mama a ticket for her birthday. and i just realized that i don't have a picture of daphne. the only one i had the sister made me delete. sorry daphne!

some chick that wasted 20 minutes of our garth time. i don't remember her name, but she wasn't too bad.

and there he is rising from the stage!

the pic is blurry or noisy if you're buffy but look at his bowed legs.

i stopped taking pictures at this point because the sister was getting some pretty great pictures. garth was a-mazing, and i'm glad i can cross #14 off my list! i would totally see him again if i could. and i think all the ladies with me would too.

the catcher in the rye

2010-12-13T08:48:00.004-06:00

i read the catcher in the rye this week because of this. i'm not quite sure why i chose it, but i did.

and i couldn't get out of my therapist brain the whole time. shortly into the book, i had diagnosed holden with depression. sleep difficulties, hopeless and sad feelings, few friends, poor appetite, psychosomatic complaints, poor concentration and school performance, thoughts of death and suicide...he's got it. and to go even further, i think it was probably triggered by his younger brother's death and that he was self-medicating with the alcohol.

i wonder what my take would have been on it had i read it in school when i was younger.

the plant

2010-12-04T17:38:00.004-06:00

BREAKING NEWS: i have been keeping a plant alive.

here is a picture i took in august when i first got it from my parents' house...

and here it is now 4 months later:

it's not as full, but it's still alive and hanging in there. the pictures were taken with different cameras and the lighting is different. but it's alive!

part of the problem is this:

it's the only green thing that my poor indoor cats have. and they have decided to chew on the ends. but again...it's alive! it's the first plant i have kept alive this long. holla!

so long #2.

today's thoughts

2010-11-20T07:19:00.001-06:00

1. seriously...who wears knee highs anymore? i saw them yesterday with a skirt. along with shoulder pads. and 8 rings on 1 person. i chuckled.

2. let's talk about the body scans. i went through one last month, and it was not that big of a deal. maybe it was because i really didn't know what the images looked like, but it wasn't like they were out on the open for all to see. if you don't think about what is going on, it's just fine. and it certainly beats the feel-ups by the tsa agents.

3. i was in a room of folks the other day and started talking about sec football. and i could hear the crickets chirping. made me realize that i was further away from home than i thought.

#21

2010-11-08T17:35:00.001-06:00

it's in a ponytail! but i got it all chopped off today. i couldn't stand it anymore.

it was the first time i had had a professional hair cut in 10 years. it's safe to say that i will no longer be cutting my own hair...i forgot how good it was to have someone do that for you.

so...down with #21!

4 on the 31st

2010-10-31T16:25:00.006-05:00

yeah...i know the title isn't catchy. but it is what it is.

1. guess what i saw today....a halloween wedding. i felt a bit like a creepy stalker, but if you are getting married in a public place dressed up like vampires and fairies with elvis as a guest...expect to be stared at.

2. i went on a hike today and am loving this weather. and i got to talk auburn football with a hiker guy that i met along the way. i also saw the wedding there. i forgot to mention that they got married in a cave. makes it sound even more interesting, doesn't it?

3. what about those tigers? i posted on facebook that i felt like a proud mama. i loved them when they went 5-7, and i love them now! they are doing so great, and i'm so proud of them!

4. i think i've been living in clarksvegas for about 3 full months now, and i'm starting to feel settled and at home. i've tested out all the frozen yogurt places, am in a small group at church, and have learned my way around. is it nashvegas, no...but it's working out just fine.

new mexico

2010-10-30T12:57:00.013-05:00

i went to new mexico earlier this month to go to a conference for work and got in as much sight-seeing as a 7:00-5:00 schedule would allow.

fyi...lots of pictures ahead though i did narrow it down from the 400 that i took.

these chillies were everywhere.

what's a trip to the desert without a picture of a cactus?

old town in albuquerque

it seemed like everything was painted turquoise.

we went to the huge balloon festival held annually in albuquerque. and it was too windy for the balloons to fly. talk about disappointing. our consolation was a fireworks show.

snaggle tooth homeless man. priceless.

sandia mountain at the sandia casino. if i remember correctly, it got the name when folks saw the reddish color of the mountain at sunset. sandia = watermelon in spanish. btw...i won $17. holla!

beginning of a very informative jeep tour through new mexican landscape.

part of a ghost town...

indian petroglyphs

even though we didn't see any balloons when we went to the balloon fiesta, i was lucky enough to have a view of them every morning from my hotel room.

sandia tramway up the sandia mountain

right after she said "oh shit celia." i convinced her to go on the chair lift up and down the mountain.

route 66 in santa fe

apparently new mexico is kind of like mexico. i feel like i should have probably known that.

winery

2010-10-23T15:31:00.010-05:00

did you know that clarksvegas has its own winery? it does, but before you get too excited, it's not that big, and we couldn't really see the behind the scenes on how they make the wine.

and it was probably not the best time of year to go visit. the only grapes i saw were these:

rotten and on the ground. and the leaves and vines were drying out and dying.

but it was nice. we got to taste a bunch, and in earth-shattering news, i found one that i liked. it's probably a bit of a cheat because it's the wine they suggest you use for sangria. and that happens to be one of my favorite drinks. oh well. it still counts. bye bye #5 & #10.

2010-10-02T13:59:00.003-05:00

you should read this.

eating clean

2010-09-26T18:44:00.004-05:00

i googled eating clean...not really what i expected. in my head, eating clean is not eating so many processed foods and cutting down the amount of artificial flavors and sweeteners. so, i am going to pretend that's what it means.

i did #19, and it was super easy. how have i lived 29 years without ever steaming vegetables? maybe it's because we southerns know how to take a perfectly good, healthy vegetable and cook all the healthy out of it.

i also did #7, and it reminded me that i'm not a fan of cooking. the recipe (asparagus and mozzarella stuffed chicken breasts) was good though. i should cook more, but it's the last thing i want to do after a long day at work.

i made myself a nice, healthy grocery list and am really going to put forth the effort to eat cleaner...even if it takes a little more time. let's hope this lasts, and i don't revert to what is convenient.

2010-09-25T18:41:00.003-05:00

it's my yearly installment of auburn cats. we're geared up and ready for this game...

war eagle!

it's great to be an auburn tiger!

2010-09-19T17:48:00.006-05:00

the sister and i went to the auburn/clemson game this weekend. it was in-tense...not only the game but the folks we were sitting around. let's just say that some of the guests in our section had partaken in their choice of inebriating beverages before they came. one smelled totally rotten and even fell on my lap. another threw up. and the sister shared a bottle of water with another complete stranger.

it was pretty interesting. here are a few pictures...

a different view of our beloved samford hall:

our obstructed view. espn decided to put a cameraman in front of us. thanks espn. you're the best.

a view of the band...mic man...and the blue crowd waiting on the players to come out...

the offense. i love that they pray together. and if you look closely you can see the espn guy chris...who btw was wearing shorts with his tie and suit jacket.

yes we cam!

war eagle! the game was long and hard on the heart but we won, and that's what counts.

i totally bought this canvans at the auburn store....frivolous, spontaneous, and not needed, but i wanted it. crossing on #17 now!

why i love my job

2010-09-13T15:46:00.006-05:00

i had the day off today. i get every other monday off because i work longer hours the other days. it is rare that i actually stay in town the weekends of my mondays off, but i did this weekend. it was nice and quiet, and i got to run a few errands without having to deal with half of the population.

but i can already feel myself tensing up and dreading going to work in the morning. so, taking a page from a friend's book, i thought that maybe i should remind myself of the reasons why i love my job and of the reasons why i do what i do. i don't think that i focus on that enough. i'm quick to bemoan all the notes i am behind on, how tired i am, how stressful the job is, and how many hours i work but am not quick enough to talk about the positives of it. so, here goes...

i love my job because...

i get to be witness to healing....maybe not in large, grand ways but in little ways. i get to hear and celebrate when a kid's anxiety has decreased from a 10 (most intense) to a 2 (on SUDS scale). i get to see a child resolve his separation anxiety and go from crying for the whole school day to smiling and waving goodbye to his parent without any problem. i get to see children learn to make friends and develop a vocabulary for appropriately expressing their feelings. i get to see parents "get" parenting skills. i get to celebrate when a teen-ager chooses to practice a coping strategy instead of cutting.
i get to hear "hey miss celia" when i go into a classroom or when i walk down the hall....even from kiddos that i don't serve. it is usually followed by high fives or hugs. and who doesn't love a good high five?
because i now live 15 minutes from work! one of the best decisions i made was to move closer to work. granted the shopping and entertainment isn't the same but having a 30 minute round trip commute vs 2+ hour commute makes me grateful every day.
getting to work in the nitty gritty dirty lives of families is a privilege. yes...it can be stressful, but it is also a privilege that families allow me to enter into the inner workings of their lives.
because i have a job! so many don't these days, and i have one that pays me well and pays for me to go to trainings. and because it pays me well, i can afford to have nice things.
because i work with some great people. granted not every day or every person is nice and rosy, but i have a few co-workers that are really great and give me lots of free therapy.
and finally, i love my job because it gives me the opportunity to be a conduit of God's grace and his healing every.single.day. therapists, counselors...whatever you call them are in the trenches every day. we see things and hear stories that most could not possibly imagine. though it's hard, it's a privilege and an honor. and i have to remind myself that it is my mission field. it's not africa, it's not an urban poverty stricken area, but i'm still doing the work that i've been called to do. and for that i'm thankful.

crossing things off...

2010-09-11T11:04:00.003-05:00

i got a camera a few weeks ago and am getting into the routine of taking pictures again. so...let's cross #1 off the list.

and i got the barstools that i have been eyeing for a few years. why it took me that long to buy them....i don't know. but i heart them and sit in them every day. i don't ever sit at the table in the dining room though....never really have. so, the new conundrum is figuring out if i should keep the table, get a desk, or what to do so that i'll actually use the room.

yay for crossing off #15! here are the beauties (taken with my new camera):

9/11

2010-09-11T09:01:00.004-05:00

today is a day that most of us will always remember.

9 years ago, to this very hour, i was in the check-out line at foy getting breakfast after my 8:00 class. another student mentioned that something had happened in new york but speculated that it was probably not true. when i returned to my table, my roommate went over to a tv in foy and watched the second plane hit the second tower.

we then went upstairs to watch the news coverage unfold and america, as we knew it, change forever.

fast forward 9 years. and i am now working with children who, for the most part, were not even born when this occurred but are so effected by it. they are children of our active duty military service members. i won't get on my soapbox about the effects of this because i'm sure you can imagine what it would be like if you were a 8-year-old and your parent was in a war zone for over a year and you were only able to talk to him/her for a few minutes every 6 weeks.

so, on this anniversary of one of the most horrific tragedies, it is important to not only remember those who died 9 years ago but also those that are still sacrificing their life, their families, and often times their own mental health.

i believe in auburn and love it!

2010-09-10T18:28:00.002-05:00

i am auburn

2010-09-02T17:47:00.002-05:00

this sums it up better than anything i could have ever written...

I am Auburn.

I am the 30-year old couple coming back to campus for the first time with both little ones in tow. One wears her first blue and orange cheerleader outfit; the other wears #34 even though he is too young to understand why.

I am the 50-year old man who hoped no one saw tears in his eyes when the eagle circled the field. I was too choked even to say 'War Eagle'. For a moment, I felt foolish and then I didn't care. God, I love this place.

I am the 60 year old woman meeting her freshman granddaughter who is now the 3rd generation of AU students in our family. Despite my age, I'd strap it on Saturday and hit someone if it weren't for my gender and this blasted arthritis.

I am Auburn and I have always believed I was different. You can see it when you look up into the stands. My orange is not the same as Tennessee’s and my blue is not that of Florida. But the differences go much deeper than my colors. Read my creed. What other school has one? I genuinely believe in these things. To be a real Auburn man or woman speaks of character, not of geography. All are welcome to walk though my gates, not just the wealthy or the elite.

Georgia and Alabama may have their nations, but we have always been family. Make no mistake, we loathe defeat, but even in defeat, we would rather be an Auburn Tiger than anything else. We are family and you are the sons of Heisman, the sons of Jordan and Dye. You come from a long line of brothers whose names include Burkett, Sidle, Owens, Sullivan, Beasley, Jackson and Rocker. It is a great heritage.

So this Saturday, when the warm ups are over and the prayers and amen spoken, when you hear my thunder growing in the stands above you, when you stand in the tunnel and the smoke begins to form, listen for my voice when you run onto my field. Behind the frenzy of the shakers and deafening roar, I will tell you something in a whisper you may miss. I will be telling you that you are my sons and I am proud of you for the way you wear the burnt orange and navy blue. I am telling you that you are my sons and I love you.

Auburn is so much more than a city or a school or a team or a degree. It is something that, once you have experienced it, will live inside of you forever and become a part of what makes up who you are...

It is driving into town on a game day. You may have come from hundreds of miles away and as you get closer and closer to the city limits, you feel it rising inside of you. Other cars on the highway proudly display their orange and blue flags, magnets or car tags, and you honk and wave at them, because, for that one day, you are all on the same team.

It is the smell in the air and the ritualistic act of tailgating...catching up with old friends, making new ones, and invitations from perfect strangers to try their ribs or watch their satellite TV showing all of the day's important match-ups...of course, all being secondary to the one that will occur in the great cathedral of Jordan-Hare later that day.

It is the Tiger Walk...where you might just see 300 pound men overcome with emotion and weeping with pride because you have come there to cheer them on. As they walk by, you might exchange a glance with one or two of them and you can see it in their eyes...it is going to be their day.

It is the students...dressed in their best, because going to an Auburn game is like going to church for Auburn people....you show the same respect as you would if you were in God's house. Those students remind you of the days when you were walking in their shoes and Auburn was your home...but then you realize, in many ways, it is still and always will be HOME.

It is that lump that rises in your throat when the band plays the Alma Mater as the eagle is soaring over your head during pregame.

It is walking around on a "foreign" and sometimes hostile campus. You are easily identified (Auburn people always are) and the enemy jeers and shouts things at you to mask their feelings of intimidation. But just then, you happen upon a friend you have never met before. You know they are your friend by the colors they wear or the shaker in their hand. You exchange a "War Eagle" and a confident grin because he/she knows what you know.

It is when your heart leaps with every touchdown, field goal, sack, and interception...because those are our boys. And win or lose, they will always have our undying support. After all, it is those boys that you are really there for, and not a coach or a logo or a trustee or a president.

It is the complete and utter exhilaration of walking away victorious over a worthy opponent...that feeling of pride and accomplishment as if it were your own feet that had crossed the goal line scoring the last points yourself...that feeling of wanting to scream War Eagle" at the top of your lungs and hug complete strangers...and then there is the ultimate high of defeating your most hated foes from across the state.

No words can describe what this feels like, but you know because you have experienced it.

It is the sheer agony of defeat as the last minutes tick off the clock and you realize that all hope of a victory is gone. You feel like crying and maybe you do...then you hear the faint sounds of a cheer that grows louder and louder...."ITS GREAT TO BE AN AUBURN TIGER."

It is knowing that year after year, no matter how things change in our hectic lives, you can always come back to "the Loveliest Village on the Plains"...the place where you came from...your home. It will probably look a little different and there will be new names on the backs of the jerseys, but deep down, no matter what, it is still the same.You still love it as much as you always have because Auburn is as much a part of you as your arms, legs and the orange and blue blood that runs through your veins.

And, finally, it is the feeling you have right now as you read these lines....the anticipation inside of you because you know it's almost time....It's about to start all over again...but then it really never goes away, does it?

(written by Robert L. Gillette)

cadiz, kentucky

2010-08-22T11:24:00.004-05:00

ever heard of cadiz, kentucky? yea...me neither.

until...i saw this billboard on my way to work one day. what clever advertising cadiz. i heart antique stores.

so, i decided to take a little road trip yesterday. to cadiz, kentucky.

i stopped at land between the lakes. it was so quiet and peaceful. had i been dressed more appropriately, i would have stayed longer. jeans + humid 90 degree weather = celia not staying outside long.

and then to the shopping...

the people were very friendly. one of the shop owners gives the military a discount. typically this means active duty, but she also gave it to me since i work on post. thanks lady!

one of the stores was 3 stories, and i swear i thought i was going to go crashing through the top floor. it was creepy and scary, and i got out of there as quickly as i could.

the stores had a ton of things that i had never seen, but i limited myself and just added to my hobnail and blue mason jar collection. here's my loot.

successful day, and i think this trip can count for #20.

words of wisdom from an antique store...

2010-08-21T18:29:00.004-05:00

i went on an adventure today and saw this quote on a wall in one of the stores. it made me stop and think...

a government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have.
--gerald ford

vegetarian?

2010-08-20T19:05:00.005-05:00

do you ever stop to think that the hamburger you are eating used to be a living, breathing cow? or how about the piece of chicken? it used to cluck around.

sometimes, when i see cows on trailers or chickens in pins on the back of an 18-wheeler, i get sad.

it's a little sad that something has to die so that i can have some delicious food. it doesn't really stop me from eating it, but when i see it in my face like that, i'm sad.

a little cat visited me on my porch for 2 days this week. i couldn't not feed it even if it meant that the cat would stay around. i don't obviously need another cat, but i just couldn't entertain the thought that the cat might starve to death.

weeks like this with these thoughts swirling in my head totally make me understand why people are vegetarians.

1 down, 29 to go

2010-07-18T18:47:00.003-05:00

i went to a church in the new town today...the first church i have tried. and guess who the guest speaker was...

the pastor from my old church. it was so weird but a good weird. i liked the church and am really going to give it a try. and it helped to kind of have his stamp of approval for the new church.

hopefully i'm on my way to accomplishing #18.

and in exciting news, i can officially cross #22 off! i purchased a washer and dryer, and it is being delivered tomorrow. hooray hooray!

i like crossing things off of lists.

30 before 30

2010-07-17T11:35:00.027-05:00

i turn 30 on march 13, 2011. that's 7 months to accomplish this list. am i being a bit hopeful that i'll do them all? probably. but a girl can try.

~~buy a camera. and then actually use it regularly.~~ (DONE!)
~~keep a plant alive for more than 3 months.~~ (DONE!)
~~meet with a financial advisor and get my money in order.~~ (DONE!)
go on a zip line.
~~find a wine i really like.~~ (DONE!)
~~watch the entire friends series (all 10 seasons)~~ (DONE!)
~~try a new recipe.~~ (DONE!)
shoot a gun.
~~read a book that i should have read in school but didn't.~~ (DONE!)
~~visit a winery.~~ (DONE!).
~~cook an entire meal using only paula deen's recipes.~~ (DONE!)
exercise regularly and eat healthier.
learn to make at least one mixed drink well.
~~do something on my bucket list.~~ (DONE!)
~~buy the barstools that i have been wanting for over a year.~~ (DONE!)
~~go to a museum of some kind.~~ (DONE!)
~~treat myself to something frivolous and spontaneous.~~ (DONE!)
~~find a church in the new town and get involved in it.~~ (DONE!)
~~make an entire meal with only fresh veggies.~~ (DONE!)
~~take a trip to a random place.~~ (DONE!)
~~let my hair get long enough to put into a ponytail.~~ (DONE!)
~~finally purchase a washer and dryer so, after 7 years, i can do laundry in my own apartment.~~ (DONE!)
~~read the stack of books that my mother gave me last year.~~ (DONE!)
attempt to begin composting.
~~bake something from scratch that i usually use a mix for or buy already made.~~ (DONE!)
~~i MUST take a trip to ikea!~~ (DONE!)
convince my aunt to let us help her clean out and organize her house and then actually do it.
~~go on a hike.~~ (DONE!)
~~see a comedian (live and in person) that makes me laugh out loud.~~ (DONE!)
~~take a fun trip to celebrate my 30th birthday.~~ (DONE...we're going to let this trip count since it was a-mazing.)

p.s. this list was hard to make. i'm not really one to plan and set goals like this. we'll see how it goes...

goodbye #908

2010-07-15T20:54:00.004-05:00

dear apartment #908,

you've sheltered me well the past 4 years. we had some good times and some not so good times.

you were with me when i started my first big girl job. you were with me when i had to move locations with that job, when i got promoted, and even when that organization got a little crazy and let us go but rehired us 3 days later.

you were with me when my maw maw, granny, and paw paw died. i distinctly remember where i was each time i heard the news.

someone almost caught you on fire, and some people got kicked out of you. you also hosted some pretty fun get togethers.

you were with me through a car wreck, through a flood, and through other major world news.

you let me move furniture around all the time, put a ba-jillion holes in your walls, and kept me pretty safe.

but some not so good people have begun to move in around you, and i work too far away from you.

so, it's time to move. our time together has been swell.

sincerely,
a girl who is moving on up

my morning off

2010-06-21T12:32:00.003-05:00

1. i was out with the senior citizen population of nashville this morning. i had the oil changed in my car at 9, and the place was full of white haired people. i then went to the mall....before it opened. i decided to wait the 10 minutes instead of going home. i had the pleasure of people watching, and let's just say those old people mall walkers are no joke. do not get in their way.

2. as i was getting my oil changed, another car came up and their license plate was personalized to read XXX. who in their right mind would have that kind of tag?

3. to twitter or not to twitter? do i need another time waster? is facebook and blogging enough? and who would really care what i had to say? and what would be my username? so many questions.

4. and in more "what is this world coming to" news...parents are now apparently giving their underage children tattoos. cra-zy! i'm all for tattoos, but i'm thinking we should probably wait until the kids are older than 7. geez.

rent-a-center

2010-06-17T20:40:00.003-05:00

have you ever rented an apartment?

check.

ever rented a car?

check.

how about a movie?

check.

and maybe even a hotel room?

check.

how about renting a friend?

ummm...not so much.

you can apparently rent friends now. seriously...you can rent friends at your convenience for an hourly fee. i'm not sure if i want to laugh or feel sad about this.

really???? renting friends now? there are some things you just shouldn't rent, and i'm thinking friendship is one of them.

really? a firing squad?

2010-06-16T17:06:00.004-05:00

from cnn.com today:

Five anonymous marksmen will use matching .30-caliber rifles, standing behind a wall cut with five gunports. One of the rifles will be an "ineffective" round, similar to a blank, which delivers the same recoil as a live round. That ensures none of the riflemen will know who delivered the fatal shot.

The marksmen fire from a distance of 25 feet. The inmate is blindfolded, strapped to a chair and a target pinned to his chest.

i cannot, for the life of me, wrap my brain around this. seriously utah? a firing squad? i thought we lived in america...a country of civility. i'm not a proponent of capital punishment. i don't think it deters criminals...it doesn't respect the sanctity of all life...it's more expensive than alternatives...sometimes innocent people get executed...it ignores the possibility of redemption...my list could go on and on.

but utah...really? if you absolutely insist on killing him...at least pretend to be humane about it.

picture of the day

2010-06-13T10:54:00.002-05:00

i think this is probably evidence that i have way too many blankets:

there are 10 total (not counting what is currently on my bed and the sofa bed). but over half of them are sentimental (my mama, my great grandmother and my friend all made one, another is from africa, and another has my name on it) and the others are....well...very soft.

logic and the anti-hoarder part of me says that i need to get rid of some of the soft ones. i mean, i am only moving to a 690 square foot apartment with a bed and a sofa bed. i do not need 10 blankets/quilts.

it's saturday...the best day of the week

2010-06-12T20:51:00.004-05:00

it's been a while. and it's been a while since i've posted a list. so, you get a list of randomness tonight.

1. i am moving in a month. stressed? yes. i don't have a lot of time and seem to be going out of town 2 of the next 3 weekends. it also doesn't help that my ocd brain is going through each individual thing that i pack. i find myself saying "i really don't want to pay someone to move this crap." and so my goodwill pile is growing.

2. the other day, i was staying a friend's house because she lives close to work. and her hair dryer died. what was i to do? after freaking out for a few minutes, i found a solution. i dried my hair with the pump that blows up the air mattress. it was loud, may have damaged my already damaged hearing, and took longer than usual, but i didn't have to go to work with a wet head and i wasn't too late.

3. i spent today shopping...or helping a friend shop. it was fun and productive for her. i again found myself saying, "i don't want to pay someone to move this." and so i only bought 3 small articles of clothing. but i did experience frozen custard for the first time. it was delicious! and we ended the day with sangrias...what is better than that?

4. anyone know how to plaster nail and screw holes in walls (that are textured)? my lovely apartment complex is going to charge me $7 for every hole unless i do it myself. and let's face it...i have lived here for 4 years and like to move things around. there are a lot of holes, and i can't afford $7/hole. directions needed!

5. where did the 95 degree weather come from? to quote one of my facebook friends today: "did somebody leave their oven on and open? could you please close it because you're making it hot as hell outside!"

6. i love saturdays. i can sleep late and do whatever the heck i want.

7. i went to the cmt music awards with the sister this week. it was so interesting. everyone should go to an awards show once. it wasn't on my bucket list, but it should have been.

8. so, it's really sad to see the beautiful alabama beaches that i grew up on covered in oil. really sad.

9. with the risk of stepping on toes...how about the 16-year-old girl attempting to sail around the world ALONE? i feel like this should be a snl really with seth & amy segment. really? really? why is this ok people? parents don't usually let 16-year-olds spend 7 months straight at home alone....why is it ok to let them spend it on isolated waters that could become dangerous at any moment? skill or no skill...she's still 16. i just don't get it.

10. and how about that lovely father in south america that fathered children with 2 of his daughters and had begun to abuse 2 of his grandchildren/children? i literally almost threw up when i read this story.

11. and i'm out of randomness. off to pack a box or two.

my paw paw

2010-05-17T20:21:00.004-05:00

luther wallace burton
march 13, 1917-may 16, 2010

my paw paw was quite the man. he loved to garden. i mean LOVED it, and i think he only stopped when he was deep into his 80s and had trouble getting around. he and my maw maw always had tons of vegetables and sent me back to auburn on multiple occasions with an ice chest full of things from the garden.

we shared a birthday....born on the exact same day 74 years apart.

and my paw paw could cook him some food...his hushpuppies were the best i have ever put in my mouth.

he loved his little church, ironation united methodist. and when i was in seminary, he was one of my biggest supporters and encouragers....though most don't know that.

my paw paw could also make anything out of wood. i have many a memory of exploring his wood shop, picking out something for him to make, or picking out something that he had already made.

he loved to smoke a pipe...

and he loved to eat...like most good burtons do. we spent the majority of our thanksgivings with the burtons. and one of my favorite things that my paw paw used to do was kind of toss his fork down after eating a really good meal. i even catch myself doing that sometimes.

and he loved my maw maw. here they are at one of the thanksgiving gatherings...

he was also pretty funny and kept us laughing.

this is the last picture i took of him...

while my paw paw is gone, i know that he lives forever in my daddy and in my brother. there are times that my sister and i think...that is just like paw paw.

and he isn't suffering anymore.

and like i said with my granny, i take comfort in these words:
weep not, weep not,
he is not dead;
he's resting in
the bosom of Jesus.
--james weldon johnson

and at the age of 29, i no longer have any living grandparents. it feels really strange.

it's been a year

2010-05-07T07:00:00.001-05:00

a year ago, we lost a pretty special lady...my granny.

and i miss her.

i think i miss hearing her laugh the most.

i miss her witty sense of humor. i miss her jokes. i miss hearing her talk. i miss playing with her hair. i miss being able to touch her and hug her. i miss her stories and her curiosity. i miss sitting at her kitchen table and talking. i miss seeing her play with the rings on her finger. i miss her strength, her hospitality, and her love.

i miss her, but i know that i was blessed to have her for 28 years.

and i know that i can take comfort in these words:
weep not, weep not,
she is not dead;
she's resting in
the bosom of Jesus.
--james weldon johnson

rain rain go away!

2010-05-03T08:40:00.002-05:00

this is why i have been glued to the tv for the past 2 days:

the news is calling this rain historic. they are saying that we have received 12-15 inches of rain, the most in recorded history. no wonder so much of middle tennesse is underwater.

i'm high and dry, haven't left my apartment in 3 days, and can't make it to work today. i don't have much ability to make or receive calls and am conserving water due to one of the water purification centers being flooded. but i do have power and internet and am quite thankful for that.

nashville is pretty sad. opry mills, the opry house, and the opryland hotel are all flooded. downtown is flooded. bellevue is flooded. antioch is flooded. it's sad.

picture of the day...

2010-04-26T19:20:00.000-05:00

2010-04-05T18:40:00.002-05:00

i'm probably a day late and a dollar short, but i finally got around to reading the shack. it took a little while for me to get into it, but i ended up really liking it. there is something to be said for how he explained the trinity in such real ways.

here's the paragraph that i still can't get out of my head:

just because i work incredible good out of unspeakable tragedies doesn't mean i orchestrate the tragedies. don't ever assume that my using something means i caused it or that i needed it to accomplish my purposes. that will only lead you to false notions about me. grace doesn't depend on suffering to exist, but where there is suffering you will find grace in many facets and colors.

from church today:

2010-04-04T11:03:00.005-05:00

easter is about remembering and worshiping the only hope capable of sustaining a human life through anything.

it might feel like friday in your life, but sunday is coming.

He has risen, and there is hope for your future and forgiveness for your past!

2010-03-31T17:41:00.003-05:00

dear wbc,

this is low, even for you.

you and i are apparently not reading the same Bible. forgive me for not remembering when Jesus took to the streets and spewed hatred.

the God that i know, is a God of love, and i really wish you all could experience it.

you do not evoke any feelings in me except pity. i pity your misinterpretation of scripture. i pity the lack of love that you have in your relationship with Jesus. i pity you for having nothing else to do with your time than to prey on the weak, the needy, and the hurting. i pity you for not having a true understanding of the life and ministry of Jesus Christ.

i pity you. and i'm done.

sincerely,
someone who doesn't have it all right but does know that Jesus is love

glass lamps

2010-03-29T16:38:00.007-05:00

i have been eyeing glass lamps for quite some time but their price tag has kept me from taking one home.

from crate and barrel: $189

from pottery barn: $169-$199

from room and board: $349

from design within reach: $960

and mine at the much lower price of $60:

lesson learned: just wait several months and eventually target will have knock off.

tuesday's randomness

2010-03-23T18:33:00.002-05:00

1. i paid off one of my student loans...it had the highest interest rate. yay for that. i really hate debt and wish i could hurry up and pay the rest off.

2. i am utterly exhausted. according to merriam-webster, one of the definitions of exhausted is to tire extremely or completely by overwork. that's me. work is completely wearing me out...more so that it ever has before. i thought this job would be less intense than my last. just kidding. it would be nice to be able to eat lunch.

3. i am still not watching tv during the week. but that is mainly because i am working late and going to bed early. there is not much time for that these days.

4. i really want to take a trip somewhere.

5. who cares that the vice president dropped the f-bomb? not me.

6. i want one of these. my brother thinks it's stupid, but i like it.

7. i also have the urge to go to ikea. it's probably a good thing the closest one is in atlanta.

8. and finally...someone sent this to me today. something i totally need to cling to:

find rest, o my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
he alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, i will not be shaken.
psalm 62:5-6

so i don't forget...

2010-03-15T20:58:00.002-05:00

my brother totally lit my hair on fire on my birthday.

he threw a sparkler at my head and caught my hair on fire. luckily i know how to stop, drop, and roll and not much damage was done.

worst birthday card ever

2010-03-03T19:24:00.004-06:00

while i have deep love for most things auburn university, i hate birds...even our poor eagle.

so when this beauty showed up in my inbox today, i was a tad frightened. thanks, auburn, for the worst birthday card ever.

tuesday's words of wisdom

2010-03-02T19:09:00.002-06:00

you alone are enough. you have nothing to prove to anybody.
-maya angelou

my weekend

2010-03-01T15:03:00.001-06:00

confession #1: i blog-stalk. i admit it.

my new favorite is mysixinthecity.blogspot.com. she started a new thing about posting about your weekend. so...here goes.

confession #2: sometimes i wish there was no need for my job field.

every day, i am confronted with the hurt of the world. for 8+ hours a day, i hear story after story of abuse, of trauma, of people who have lost hope. and i see how that impacts their family, their work/school, their friends, and their children.

every day, i am confronted with the reality that we live in a fallen world.

and so the weekend is my time. it's my time to decompress, my time to worship, and my time to clean.

and that's just what i did this weekend.

confession #3: i had a monica closet! my ocd self is going to be vulnerable and post a before picture.

as you can see...totally out of hand! i didn't use half of the cleaning products because i make my own, and i didn't use the other half of the stuff either. i think i had about 542678 plastic grocery bags.

and here is the result of a long hard cleaning session....

it's much more organized and streamlined. now i can find things without being hit on the head by random stuff.

confession #4: i have not taken my recycling to the center in 3 months. also out of control:

this kind of cleaning is what happens in my apartment after a long, hard week in the counseling world.

public service announcement

2010-02-22T06:00:00.001-06:00

the sister forwarded this to me. i thought it was pretty funny and pretty true. don't text and drive folks!

pearl harbor

2010-02-21T19:51:00.011-06:00

we only went to the uss arizona memorial in pearl harbor. we didn't tour the submarine or the battleship...mainly because i've been to the ones in mobile several times and wanted to spend that time on the beach.

i will say that it was a pretty emotional experience. well, not so emotional that i cried and cried. it was kind of somber like when going down to ground zero in nyc.

in the area before you get on the boat to go to the memorial, they had this mural and a list of all the survivors. it must have been something to have survived it.

it was a pretty cloudy and windy day...so, all of the pictures are a little dark.

the list with all the names...

several pictures of the wreckage...

it was nice to see a little piece of history.

hawaii

2010-02-09T07:32:00.000-06:00

warning: this is a long post with a ton of pictures, and it doesn't include pearl harbor. that will have to be a completely different post.

i had a lot of fun in hawaii...even though it was technically a work trip. i got to experience a lot more of the island because one of my friends from work had lived there for several years. the people were friendly, the fish was unbelievably good, and the weather was great!

hawaiians also have some interesting lingo:

aloha: welcome, hello, goodbye
talk story: to gossip, chat
mahalo: you're welcome
pau: done, finish
vog: volcanic smog, occurs when the volcano on the big island erupts and gases are emitted like air pollution
da kine: that whatchamacallit
eh: you know?
howzit: how are you doing?
shi shi: go the bathroom (#1)
haole: white person

the view from my lanai the first night:

the other view...Honolulu:

after our training we went to the north shore, and my friend introduced me to banapples...one word: a-mazing. they are a cross between apples and bananas and are quite delicious.

pipline:

sunset beach:

turtle beach:

the dole plantation had pineapple ice cream...delicious!

leathered-skinned beach bum with a mullet...

the hotel i stayed at had penguins...why? i don't know, but they were kinda cute.

the tourist beach at waikiki...it was a bit too rocky for me.

sunrise sky...

flowers were everywhere. if you were single and ready to mingle, you wore them on the right side. if you were taken, you wore them on the left side.

my only problem was the birds. they were everywhere. this one and some of his friends thought it would be nice to hang out on my lanai every day.

diamond head:

lanikai beach...my favorite:

there was pretty landscape all over the island:

and there were also shacks and "houseless" people. this is the best drive-by picture i could get of the tents.

rabbit island...look at at the different colors of the ocean:

makapuu beach:

lava rocks:

and when i got back, i had to dig my car out of 7 inches of snow at the airport.

the envelope

2010-02-07T14:33:00.006-06:00

i'm going to blog about hawaii, but it's going to take a while. in the meantime, i wanted to go ahead and post pictures of my new artwork.

my sister bought a new house and wanted a neat piece of artwork above her fireplace. she had seen pictures of envelopes blown up and thought about doing that with one of our grandparents' letters. this concept was also featured on my favorite website. so, of course i had to have one for my apartment too.

my sister had a letter and envelope that my granddaddy wrote my granny during the war. so, she had it enlarged and framed. and it turned out great!

here is a picture of my granddaddy during his tenure in the army:

here is my granny. she would often go to photo booths and then send the picture to him.

and here my the envelope enlarged and framed. it's not the best picture...it's at an angle, but you get the gist. it's also pretty big (33''x52'').

and here are my grandparents how i remember them...silver haired, aged, and still in love after a ba-jillion years together:

while i don't have a nice new house like my sister, it's still pretty nice to have such a unique reminder of my grandparents.

2010-01-22T17:51:00.002-06:00

lately, every afternoon...or night...when i leave work, i can literally feel the tension in my neck and muscles. things have been stress-ful.

but i leave for hawaii on sunday. hip hip hooray! even though it is a work trip, there will be time for rest and relaxation. and i won't have to type a single progress note or diffuse a single crisis for a whole week! and i think that might excite me a little more than actually being in hawaii.

i have yet to pack a single thing. guess i better get to getting.

here's your inspirational quote of the day:

while i know myself as a creation of God, i am also obligated to realize and remember that everyone else and everything else are also God's creation.
-maya angelou

(even birds and the other team)

water zoo

2010-01-17T17:00:00.016-06:00

today, thad and i went to the water zoo in chattanooga...better known as the aquarium.

these 2 were not behind any glass or nets....yikes! they definitely made my heart beat fast, but i was able to take their picture from a distance...hence the picture.

thad was afraid to touch the sting rays...

so, i had to show him how it was done.

according to thad, this is a pitcher plant...which is a carnivorous plant.

i was trying to take a picture of this penguin but the stupid staff squirted water right in the way. thanks a lot heifers.

notice the big pole that one of the divers is holding....that's to ward of sharks. why would you want to hang out in a tank with sharks with only a pvc pipe thing to save you?

jellyfish!

i don't really remember what this is called, but it looked neat.

the sleeping turtle

this was in the seahorse exhibit. i thought the coral was pretty.

i think this is some sort of dragon fish but am probably wrong.

he actually touched the sturgeon on the first try.

gi-normous catfish!

we were impressed by how they set up one of the freshwater exhibits...complete with a boat, paddle, pier, and minnow bucket.

the trip's not complete without a trip to ben & jerry's.

and a truck load full of crap with a duct-taped laundry basket. sir, while i appreciate your thriftiness, the dollar store sells them for a few bucks. splurge and get yourself one.

we stopped at little river canyon on the way back...very pretty and serene.

three on thursday

2010-01-07T17:47:00.003-06:00

1. the sister entered in a video of the brother opening the present i gave him for christmas for some prize from cma fest. go and rank the nerd alert video 5 stars (and none of the others), sign in at the bottom, and submit. http://cmafest.com/2009/ViewResults.aspx

2. all i have to say about the game tonight is HOOK 'EM HORNS! i can never, ever cheer for the other team. ever.

3. because of the weather, we got to go into work 2 hours late today. i thoroughly enjoyed that. i wish i could get up at 7 every morning. and so far, i think every other school in middle tennessee has been closed tomorrow...except the school i work at. greeeeaaaat.

2009

2009-12-31T08:00:00.004-06:00

in 2009, i got promoted to a supervisory position and then several months later got "let go" when the economy finally hit the mental health field. 2 days after i got the news, i had accepted a job offer that significantly increased my income. for the past 6 months, the job has been great!

in 2009, my parents moved from the town that i grew up in, and i have yet to return to that small town.

in 2009, i saw wicked...and it officially became my favorite musical.

in 2009, i began to carpool to work...something that i have never done before. spending that much time in the car with another person every day is quite interesting.

in 2009, i lost my granny. i still really miss her.

in 2009, i bought a brand new car....the first time that i have ever done that. my only 2 requirements were good gas mileage and an input for my ipod.

in 2009, i had some adventures at the lake...including getting stranded on an island.

in 2009, i was able to triple my savings.

in 2009, i learned that i have hearing loss.

in 2009, i experienced the pure joy that a talking cookie jar lion can bring.

in 2009, i jumped out of a plane! and it was the coolest thing that i have done in my 28 years on the planet.

in 2009, i spontaneously got another tattoo.

in 2009, i went to one of the largest shopping malls in the world. it was a-mazing!

in 2009, due to my increase in income, i spontaneously purchased some big ticket items. let's hope this trend doesn't carry over to 2010.

in 2009, i learned (or finally realized) that i have some odd quirks...i don't like for someone to hold one of my fingers and not let go (makes me feel claustrophobic)...i don't really like to wear socks but begrudgingly will in really cold weather....i hate to eat cold ketchup...i don't really like hotel's covers and will bring my own if i can...and i really, really, really hate birds.

it's been a year. i had some stressful times. i had some very sad times. but i also had some pretty neat experiences. i guess that's the way life goes.

now, i'm off to ring in the new year with the sister and the daphster and her cute kid.

merry christmas and war eagle!

2009-12-17T18:16:00.004-06:00

words of wisdom from tv tonight...

2009-12-09T20:58:00.001-06:00

scars remind us where we've been. they don't have to dictate where we're going.

kentucky

2009-12-07T16:04:00.003-06:00

this is why i'm glad i don't live in kentucky anymore...

snow is pretty and all but not when i have to drive in it.

my weekend visit in kentucky was full of fun, shopping, memories, and rest. but i do not wish to ever reside any more north than nashville.

when i got back home, i had a ton of cat hair on my living room floor, and the cats are both sporting scratches. it seems as though they had themselves quite the fight while i was gone.

ten on tuesday...

2009-12-02T20:25:00.004-06:00

1. i got my new toms shoes the other day and am totally loving them. you should seriously consider buying a pair. they're comfortable, cute, and for every pair you buy, they give a pair to children in need.

2. please....parents don't "take away" christmas from your children when they misbehave. that's going way overboard.

3. we went black friday shopping again this year, and i impulsively bought a tv. i got some presents for other people, but i, by far, spent the most money on myself.

4. who cares what tiger woods does? i'm pretty tired of hearing about it. let the man live his life.

5. i can't believe it's december already. this year has flown by. i wish i could say that i was getting in the christmas mood, but i'm not. i'm just not feeling it this year.

6. here is your picture of the day...

needless to say, it took quite a few pictures to get this one. he liked to play with the jungle bell, and mr. k would have nothing to do with it.

7. does it make me a bad person to feel sad when they execute someone on death row? i still can't quite wrap my head and heart around this.

8. i have been taking a benadryl to help me go to sleep at night but have been drinking a little caffeine to help me make it through the day. seems kind of counterproductive...i know.

9. i brought work home to do tonight, but my work computer wouldn't let me log on. guess that means i'll be staying late tomorrow. thanks a lot technology.

10. i thought today was tuesday...all day long...until this very minute. so, it's not ten on tuesday, it's ten on wednesday. and that means it's almost the weekend, and that means that i can sleep late. i love days that i don't have to get up at 5.

thankfulness

2009-11-29T20:08:00.001-06:00

i have been incredibly blessed.

i have never not known the love of family. i have never not known the love of Jesus Christ. i have never gone without food. i have never gone without shelter. i have never gone without education. i have never gone without proper clothing. i have simply never gone without.

as a woman, i have been blessed with some pretty great female role models in my family that all seem to love unconditionally.

they all seem(ed) to be fiercly loyal to our family, be strong and faithful believers, be great cooks, be really funny, and be really smart ladies.

and for that i'm thankful.

(here is a re-cap of thanksgiving.)

taking care of yourself...

2009-11-21T13:25:00.001-06:00

this is a print that i bought when i was in minneapolis for work a few weeks ago. my sister said she didn't get it, but it spoke volumes to me at the store.

SELF-CARE!

it is something that i don't think people focus on enough...especially those of us that are therapists and counselors.

i know that there are days that hearing stories of trauma and pain one after another just sucks the life out of me. there are days that pain is everywhere i turn. there are days when i think that the story i'm hearing is the worst story that i have ever heard, but secretly i know that it won't be. there are days where the evil in the world is so evident, and i wonder where God is in all of this.

and those are the days that i have to be intentional about taking care of myself. i won't let myself read news stories about rape, abuse, or death. i won't let myself watch shows like law and order svu. i give myself permission to do whatever strikes my mood...regardless of whatever i have planned. i make sure i get enough sleep...even if that means going to bed at 8. i talk to friends. i cry. i exercise. i sit on the couch and watch mindless tv. i leave town and get a change in scenery. i spend time worshipping or talking to God. i do whatever i can think of to recharge my batteries enough to face the same pain and heartache the next day.

2009-11-11T12:46:00.002-06:00

dear miss swift,

i'm pretty tired of hearing you sing overdramatic and awkward songs about high school and love. seriously....isn't there more out there that you can write about? maybe it's annoying because the songs come on both country and pop radio stations, but i'm a bit tired of hearing songs of little substance. i even resorted to changing the radio stations when these songs come on.

take a page from another artist's book and write a song like temporary home. it'll go a long way with country music fans that are older than 12.

sincerely,
a country music fan (that is not obsessed with cu)

2009-11-08T17:26:00.003-06:00

i think i have been living under a rock.

i just discovered 2 things that have been life changing. ok...so maybe life changing is a bit dramatic.

i went to minneapolis for work last week. yes it was cold, and yes i went to the mall of america. the mall was gi-normous! i went twice and still did not have enough time to hit everything.

on this trip, i discovered 2 things...cashmere and bathroom wall mounted mirrors like this one...

when i don't wear my contacts i have to get really close to the mirror to put my make-up on...not anymore! there was one in the hotel that i stayed in, and it was so great that i bought one.

and cashmere...i knew about it but wouldn't let myself buy it because it can be expensive. not anymore! it is so comfortable and can be found on sale. at the mall, i scored a $175 cashmere sweater for $60.

a visit to the vet

2009-10-19T20:30:00.003-05:00

we had to take an emergency trip to the vet today. i think i was probably more nervous about it than mr. kitty.

he's has been limping and somewhat lethargic for the last few days. and i felt a little guilty that i went to the auburn game this weekend and left him...especially after we lost.

we rescued mr. kitty from the side of the road about 6 years ago. when we found him, he wasn't moving, had a broken tooth and tail, and was urinating blood. we had to force water down his throat for several days. he also had an injury to his leg that kept him from walking for a little bit.

and so now...because of his injury, he has arthritis and that is what is causing him to limp. we now have meds and strict dietary instructions.

bless his little heart.

he did really well though....much better than i expected. if you know mr. k, you know he isn't a fan of men or of many people in general. he never growled or tried to make a run for it. he let the vet poke and prod him and even purred at one point.

here's a picture of the big guy (weighing in at 17 pounds!) trying to cheer for auburn:

7 on the 7th

2009-10-07T17:50:00.006-05:00

1. leaving for work in the dark and getting home from work in the dark is really no fun and is kind of sad. hopefully there won't be too many more of those 12 hour days.

2. but...i do get a 4 day weekend this weekend, and I get to be an hour late to work tomorrow. i'm pretty excited about being able to sleep past 5:00 5 days in a row. it's the little things that make me happy.

3. i'm pretty proud of my tigers. 5-0 and #17 is something that i didn't really expect after last season.

4. here is a great old picture that makes me chuckle...

5. i went to birmingham 2 weekends ago. i went with the sister to look at refrigerators for her house and ended up buying a red chair. it was THE chair that i had been searching high and low for, and it was on sale. we swapped cars for the week because it obviously wouldn't fit in my car, and the heifer cracked my windshield.

6. i think it would be neat to work for the fbi. why? probably because i watch too much tv. i wonder if they have a need for therapists.

7. i really want to ride in a hot air balloon.

statistic of the day

2009-10-02T20:19:00.003-05:00

every 6 seconds, a child dies from hunger and related causes.
sources: here, here, and here.

don't you think this is completely ridiculous and unacceptable?

2009-10-01T17:59:00.003-05:00

dear scientologists,

please don't leave any more of your literature at my door. you're wasting paper and wasting your time. you are totally barking up the wrong tree. i like Jesus, and i firmly believe that psychotropic medications work. i believe in therapy and mental health and am backed by decades of research. i am not at all impressed with tom cruise or l. ron hubbard and their lack of understanding of scientific research.

and i'm really not impressed with your views on christianity and salvation.

and it makes me feel pretty sad that you won't get to go to heaven.

sincerely,
a girl that wishes you knew Jesus

the grand canyon...finally!

2009-09-27T14:31:00.029-05:00

here are some of the pictures from the grand canyon. i'm visiting the photographer and taking the pictures from her computer since she is being quite slow about sending them to me. she has edited and worked her magic on some of them. i'm sure you'll be able to tell the difference.

this is the tiny plane that we flew from vegas to the grand canyon in...

here's daphne and me on the plane...we didn't get a picture of the buffster because she was too busy being sick.

hoover dam

i think this is lake mead, but i could totally be wrong.

after a while, it all started to look the same.

one of the elk that stopped traffic...

the president visited the next day, and they were getting ready for his visit.

the sunset ride back to vegas...

the meaning

2009-09-14T16:43:00.002-05:00

i've had a trillion people ask me what my new tattoo meant. ok, maybe not a trillion...but a lot...even the kids that i work with.

and it's kinda hard to explain because it's a little complicated.

stars can be interpreted a lot of different ways....they can be symbols of truth, spirit, hope, guidance, achievements...the list could go on and on.

but i guess for me my tattoo reminds me that my strength comes from someone greater than me...from the One that created the heavens and the earth. it reminds me to look to Him for guidance. it reminds me that i come from a long line of strong people. it reminds me that those people that i love that have passed on will always be with me...even though i can't physically see them anymore.

so, there you have it for those that have wondered.

2009-08-31T10:55:00.002-05:00

learn to do good. seek justice. help the oppressed. defend the cause of orphans. fight for the rights of widows.
-isaiah 1:17

vegas trip

2009-08-23T14:48:00.024-05:00

here are several of the pictures from the vegas trip...minus the grand canyon. those will come in another post.

the reason for our trip was the sister's 30th birthday...

daphne and i said while we were planning and paying for the trip that it was our belated birthday trip too. the sister was listening and when we got in at midnight, we had prizes. i'm not going to post pictures of us because we looked a hot mess from traveling...(we had several delays and had to run through the airport to catch our connecting flight).

vegas day 1:

skydiving...go here for more pictures. i had a great time...though i was really nervous on the flight up. my instructor guy was funny and tried to get my mind off of it...not sure it helped though. but i would totally go again! it was one of the coolest things i have ever done. i think the sister has a different take on it...she puked!

and of course...the slots! we were too intimidated to play any of the tables.

we also went to see o....which of course was great. those people can move their bodies in ways that i can't even begin to imagine.

and it is totally true what they say about the food in vegas...it is fabulous! every place we ate at was great.

of course we got the frozen hot chocolate at serendipity, and again...it was great!

the bellagio fountain light show thing that is probably on every commercial or advertisement for vegas....

vegas day 2:

grand canyon all day...pictures to come later.

vegas day 3:

the strip! our photographer took pictures of every casino, but i'm not going to post them.

this is what a lot of them looked like on the inside. gaudy...extravagant...over the top...

where we stayed...

and of course, the sign...

i think this is one of the few pictures of all three of us together.

and the tattoo. i got it at the palms. it hurt...yes it hurt. but i like it, and even though it was a spur of the moment kind of thing, i don't regret it.

a view of the strip from the stratosphere...

we also went to an impersonator show here. let's just say that they need to work on their skills a little bit.

vegas day 4:

travel home. here is a view from the plane...

of course our flights home were also delayed...thanks to mr. obama. air force one was at the airport at the same time and all things had to stop so he could leave.

it was a fun, exhausting, jam-packed trip. and yes...we saw all kinds of inappropriate behavior, scandalous dressing, and tasteless advertisements.

the birthday trip

2009-08-20T21:58:00.009-05:00

i had a great time in vegas. our photographer took over 700 pictures....so, it might be a while before some get posted on here. i'll go into more detail about our trip then.

but here are 2 from skydiving....which was a-mazing. i so want to go again. the company, skydive las vegas, was so great.

there are a few more pictures here.

also...i got another tattoo. here is a picture of it. it is on my left wrist and can easily be covered up by a watch or one of my chunky bracelets...so, don't freak out family. and yes it does have meaning behind it...i'm just too tired to go into that tonight.

another birthday

2009-08-14T07:00:00.001-05:00

today is my sister's 30th birthday! and we're celebrating in style. we'll have lots of pictures to post in the next few days.

she's been quite the sister, and as the pictures show, she's always been...well...big sister-ish (she said i couldn't call her bossy...isn't that kind of bossy???)

but she's been a good big sister, and we've had lots of fun times. happy birthday sister! i love you!

birthday

2009-08-12T20:27:00.004-05:00

today is my granny's birthday...she would have been 92.

here is a picture of the siblings with her at her 90th birthday party. she had 90 pink balloons that day. i know...i had to get them blown up, and it took forever! we couldn't stop at 80...or 85...she had to have 90.

happy birthday granny! i love you!

memories

2009-07-28T19:05:00.002-05:00

it's interesting to me what people remember and what memories people hold on to throughout the years. i wonder what it is that makes certain things meaningful and others not.

my grandparents have been on my mind lately. there have been several things in my tiny apartment that over the past several days have evoked memories of them....the pan that my granddaddy used to cook breakfast in every morning while he listened to country music....the ring that my granny played with and slid around her finger...the table that sat in their house...the wooden rolling pin that my paw paw made...the necklace that my maw maw gave me when i got my feelings hurt while i was staying at their house.

i guess i've been feeling sentimental lately. i even spent a morning cooking up a breakfast like my granddaddy, using the pan, and listening to country music. it somehow made me feel a little more connected to them. silly...but true.

2009-07-15T13:31:00.000-05:00

my cat thinks he is a person. he sits next to me on the couch like this all the time.

and yes...i just blogged about my cat.

2009-07-12T12:08:00.002-05:00

lack of sleep + that time of the month + my granny dying 2 months ago + seeing an elderly lady that reminded me of my granny = me crying in wal-mart.

not my best moment.

2009-07-09T19:58:00.002-05:00

dear opry mills shoppers and employees,

it is not ok to change your child's diaper at the water feature. there are restrooms with a whole baby station set up for this.

it is also not ok to be a creepy man in victoria's secret. don't stare at women when they are picking out their undergarments.

i do not want my hair straightened, a sample of your sham wow, a massage, a manicure, any of your lotion, or my teeth whitened. please don't ask.

sincerely,
an annoyed consumer

6.6.09

2009-06-06T15:43:00.005-05:00

1. today is the anniversary of d-day. i've read a lot about it today and now have an even greater admiration for our military.

2. a lot has been going on with work. it went something like this:

wednesday: your job is being cut and so are the jobs of half of the team you supervise.
monday: tell the team the bad news.
monday afternoon: no wait...maybe your jobs aren't being cut.
tuesday: everyone can stay if they can meet the new requirements.

needless to say, it was a stressful week! i lost a lot of sleep between wednesday and monday. but...the good news is...2 days after i found out my job was being cut, i was offered another job. this job is going to provide me with a lot of great things (more money, more experience, different population, more creativity). and on top of that, all of the other staff still have jobs.

3. i bought a new car yesterday. it is the first car that i have ever purchased, and my daddy came up and helped me. the process took a while...but believe or not, we didn't have to haggle.

4. cma fest is this week. my sister is coming and staying for an entire week. i don't think we have stayed together in such tight quarters for this long since we lived together in college. then daphne is coming and bringing cute ben. it'll make for an eventful week!

5. i've gone to the lake for the past several weekends, and i seem to injure myself every time i go. one weekend, i fell going down the stairs. the weekend i got stranded, i fell going up the stairs. the next weekend, i was attempting to get out of the innertube that the jet ski was pulling. i put one foot on the jet ski and one on the innertube...bad mistake. as i was attempting to step on the dock, one of them moved, and my shin hit the side of the dock and i fell into the water. while in the water, i proceeded to kick the bottom of the lake...which just happened to be rock because it was under the boat slip. so, i had a huge knot and skinned place on my shin and several cuts on my feet. and i'm still sporting them 2 weeks later. i've also been slung off of every innertube and the jet ski multiple times...thanks to my brother. he's dangerous.

here's a picture pre-injury with daphne and ben:

2009-05-13T19:14:00.004-05:00

weep not, weep not,

she is not dead;

she's resting in the bosom of Jesus.

--james weldon johnson

mother's day

2009-05-12T11:36:00.003-05:00

mother's day 2009 will go down in infamy.

1. we buried granny the day before.
2. the jet ski's engine compartment got flooded.
3. thad and i got stranded on an island.
4. buffy's big ol' suv got stuck in the mud.
5. i fell going up the stairs and now have a skinned knee.

i'll elaborate on getting stranded...

thad and i took the jet ski (after the water was drained from the engine compartment) out on the lake. we were taking turns pulling each other on an innertube...when we went to restart the engine...and it wouldn't start.

and all thad could say was shit. i asked him several questions and all he could say was shit. and i knew we were in trouble.

we then began to drift out into the middle of the lake...and i'm not talking about a small lake. the lake is ginormous and goes on for miles.

so, we continued to drift, and no boat was in site. we then dismounted and swam the jet ski to an island that was about 150 yards away...no small feat. luckily, the island had a put in, and we were able to dock the jet ski.

we then tried all kinds of macgyver type things to get the jet ski to start, but unlike macgyver, nothing we did worked.

so, we sat on the logs, soaking wet in our swimsuits and life jackets...defeated. we were shivering, not really from the cold, but from the fact that we were out in the middle of nowhere on the lake without a way to contact anyone. i, for one, was scared!

one boat passed by on the other side of the lake. and obviously they couldn't see me waving a life jacket in the air. they didn't even slow down.

and then i knew for sure, we were stranded.

thad decided that he would attempt to swim to the nearest house...not a good idea. it's hard to swim against the current.

after some time, i began to yell for help. but no one heard us.

then thad had the idea to blow the whistle. there just happened to be a whistle attached to the key to the jet ski...and i blew the hell out of that whistle. it only stirred up some dogs at first. but eventually some people put their boat in and came to our rescue.

they towed us back to the house, and we were saved. and no major damage was done to the jet ski.

i'm not really sure how long we were out, but it felt like several hours. it was enough that we already had a shelter if the storms got worse or no one came until the next day.

we had our very own version of gilligan's island...

my granny

2009-05-08T22:58:00.006-05:00

sara carpenter clark
1917-2009

i know most have heard the funeral poem about the dash...that what truly matters is not the year before the dash or the year after...but how you spent your dash.

and i can say that my granny lived her dash, her 91 years, to the fullest.

she and my granddaddy secretly eloped and were married for 68 years after that. she was quick witted and always kept us laughing. she was always dressed to the nines, with her lipstick on and her hair done. she had a closet full of shoes. she loved to read, do word search puzzles, and know what was going on. she was honest, and she was encouraging. she loved her family fiercely.

and i miss her. i miss sitting at her kitchen table and listening to her stories and jokes. i miss playing with her hair. i miss hearing her laugh so hard she grabbed her sides. i miss the smell of her house. i miss her amazing cooking. i miss hearing her say my name.

when i was younger, whenever anyone would ask me who my hero was...it was always her. i'm not sure that i could have verbalized why i thought that then, but now i know. she loved unconditionally, was honest and truthful, was kind and caring, was loyal, and was a woman of God. she survived the death of her first born and her husband, the great depression, and a devastating tornado. she was strong. she was loving. she was my granny.

i love you granny. always have and always will.

2009-04-22T18:41:00.002-05:00

ever have those moments when you are reading a book and a line just pops out at you? that one sentence makes total sense and kind of resonates with you that day.

i'm reading c.s. lewis' a grief observed and totally had that happen today:

"only a real risk tests the reality of a belief."

so true, mr. lewis. so true.

7 on the 7th

2009-04-07T16:40:00.005-05:00

1. i went to see wicked over the weekend...fabulous! you should see it too.

2. in the past few weeks, there seem to have been several teachers and church volunteers in the nashville area that have been arrested on sexual abuse charges. that sketches me out. one of them even had an arrest warrant pending...metro schools did a background check...and hired him anyway. sketch-y!

3. i have decided that hell for me would be to be trapped in a hoarder's house with pet birds. clutter + birds = pure hell.

4. i spent 5 hours yesterday working on my stupid wireless router. i had great plans of being so productive but spent it doing everything imaginable to get the thing to work. it finally did....after 5 hours.

5. i am so ready for warm weather...not hot weather...warm weather.

6. here's a picture of a really cute, fun kid. his mama always dresses him in the cutest clothes.

7. i can't think of any more things to write.

2009-04-01T18:04:00.004-05:00

truth of the day

2009-03-27T15:28:00.003-05:00

there but for the grace of God, go i.
--john bradford

offices

2009-03-23T17:20:00.003-05:00

http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/news/shadow-of-freud-the-offices-of-psychoanalysts-079888

my office certainly does not look like these. frankly, i have never seen any offices of other mental health professionals that look like these. imagine what their houses look like.

peace

2009-03-23T16:11:00.006-05:00

it's easy to get discouraged and burnt-out working in the mental health field. it seems like there is no end to the suffering and pain. and the things that people do to each other and themselves...it can get horrific.

and i believe that it is only with God that i can do it.

about 2 weeks ago, i was having some God time and just flipped open my Bible. it opened to Psalm 147, and that Psalm has stuck with me for the past 2 weeks.

especially verses 3 & 5:
He heals the brokenhearted
and binds up their wounds.
Great is our Lord and mighty in power;
his understanding has no limit.

i know that i can't be all things to all people, but God can. He hears them, and He understands, even when i can't and others don't. and i take peace and rest in that.

domestic violence

2009-03-08T13:35:00.005-05:00

we all know what has been in the news about chris brown and rihanna. and it's sad that it is taking celebrities to draw attention to a problem that runs rampant in our society. here are a few statistics for you:

1 in 4 women will be abused in her lifetime.
women who were murdered in a domestic violence incident had called the police an average of 5 times before the murder.
it is estimated that over 5 million women are abused each year.
domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women.
in 60-75 percent of households in which a partner is abused, a child is also abused.

i wrote several papers on this in my undergrad and grad programs. i have also written about it here, here, and here. i could go on and on about this, but hear this...it is never ok to be hurt! it is never ok to be hit, belittled, controlled, isolated, or raped. no one ever deserves it. period.

in the words of oprah..."if a man hits you once, he will hit you again."

and i say...you deserve better than that because you are the daughter of the King.

2009-03-02T18:47:00.003-06:00

this ticks me off.

apparently 2 of tennessee's elected officials are pushing to ban all unmarried people from adopting children in the state. it doesn't matter if they are single, straight, gay men or women...just as long as they are married.

say what senator stanley and representative deberry?

are you truly thinking about the welfare of the children that this ban would effect? what about the hoards of children that are waiting to be adopted by loving, kind people...regardless of their marital status or sexual orientation?

the system is already broken and adding the ban would crush it. it would cost more money, and the children would have to stay in longer. they would be bounced from home to home, exposed to countless potential traumas.

i am a chrisitan...i believe in certain things. but frankly, i think it's stupid to waste time and money to limit the people that can adopt children. they need loving, safe, healthy homes...not simply a married couple.

A Prayer for the Abused

2009-02-24T15:24:00.003-06:00

by Vienna Cobb Anderson

You chose, O loving God,
to enter this world
quietly, humbly, and as an outcast.
Hear our prayers
on behalf of all who are abused:

For children,
who suffer at the hands
of parents whom they trust and love;
for spouses,
beaten and destroyed
by the very one
who promised to love
and to cherish them forever;
for all people
ignored, hated and cheated
by the very neighbor
who could be the closest one
to offer your love.

Hear the cry of the oppressed.
Let the fire of your Spirit fill their hearts
with the power of vision and hope.
Grant to them empowerment to act,
that they may not be passive victims
of violence and hatred.
Fulfill for them the promises you have made,
that their lives may be transformed
and their oppression ended.

Turn the hearts of the oppressor unto you
that their living may be changed
by your forgiving love;
and their abusive actions
and oppressive ways brought to an end.

Amen.

self-helping it

2009-01-27T17:46:00.003-06:00

i went to the bookstore yesterday to look for books for work. every now and then i go and peruse the shelves looking for information on some of the things that our clients struggle with. i literally scan every book in the self-help section...so, this can take me a while.

and i have noticed something quite interesting. the people that come into the section seem so embarrassed. yesterday, a man pulled his hood up when he walked onto the aisle. one lady walked really fast and looked over her shoulders before she would pick up a book.

it was sad. i want to say to them, it's ok...every struggles. everyone needs help from time to time. counseling works!

but i didn't. i just took my books on self-harm and grief to the check-out and wondered what the lady checking me out thought.